Where does a powerful women these days meet Men?
It is a common conception that strong women often intimidate men, as do beautiful women, so what do you do when you’re strong, successful and beautiful, the answer is often, ‘ I don’t get approached’
Women who are highly respected in their field, have often sacrificed family life in their earlier years to achieve such success, and when they’ve reached their late 30’s, they are usually thinking about taking a step back, to start a family, or in their 40’s considering cutting down their work load, and finding more time for a partner with who they can travel with, pursue a business venture or charitable project with.
But where are these men to be found? When the work place is to be regarded as out of bounds, and the rest of their time , after work is often spent at the gym, socialising with clients, and catching up with family , meeting friends, many of whom are already coupled off.
Online dating sites, don’t appeal to women who are not big on publicly displaying their personal and sensitive information online, for colleagues and clients to potentially see, and hanging around in bars too often, also can effect their reputation.
Money is not an issue for Miss Independent who takes regular 5 star holidays, a designer wardrobe and dines out in the finest places.
And what they want is a man who can also match their lifestyle.
Take Karen for example 45, a Chief Marketing Officer for a top Insurance firm.
Who lives in her owned Penthouse Apartment in London, Her past boyfriends have not been at her level financially, and although it wasn’t an issue in the beginning. They began to feel inadequate when they couldn’t keep up with her lifestyle choices.
Yet the issue women in such positions have is also, to get to where they’ve got to in the workplace, they have had to adopt certain male characteristics, been in a competitive predominately male environment, which doesn’t necessarily help them in the love stakes.
There’s also the challenge of finding balance, been constantly plugged into emails, means it may be difficult to switch off from work mode to personal mode Which is a turn off for Men. They don’t want to come home to talk shop, or to someone who is in an aggressive state of mind, they want to have a partner who is fun to be around.
Men are comfortable dating a woman who is highly successful, and even who earns more than them, but they still want them to have feminine qualities, such as been nurturing, able to show vulnerability and have a softness about them
They want a Women who still lets them be a Man.
Something Matchmakers and coaches, are able to coach women on. playing up their strengths, and bringing out their natural qualities. Catch Me Cupid also offer additional services such as personal styling, and shopping. “We also help women with their style, helping them pick out outfits which show their femininity, you can power dress in the boardroom, but on dates, feminine chic, and elegance are what attracts a Man “ says Siobhan Copland, Director, Matchmaker at Catch Me Cupid.
Matchmakers are able to highlight some of their qualities which make them suitable to be in a relationship with, and also pre screen men on their behalf, and get a deeper insight into a mans character, more than he would ever reveal in a online dating profile.
It’s not just women in the corporate environment who face challenges meeting Men to settle down with, even Celebrities face similar challenges, complaining that they just don’t get approached. Such as Natasha, a TV presenter, who recently signed up to the agency. ‘
Gone are the days when Matchmaker are seen as meddling middle aged women, who’ve been married for decades. The new breed of high-end matchmakers are younger, sexier and have faced similar challenges dating in competitive City environments. Matchmakers like those who run Catch Me Cupid, highly selective, running background checks not just on clients but potential dates, and they say they accept, only a small percentage of of potential clients, the majority of whom are women.
Siobhan Copland, who runs London and Dubai based agency Catch Me Cupid says “We get a lot more inquiries from women than men in London".
What’s hard for women is they often don’t know the agenda of a guy from the set off, you don’t know if they guy you’ve just met, is already married, or has a stable job, or even is serious about getting into a relationship." The women that come to matchmakers like the security of them having been met them first. It gives them some assurances that given the fact these men are going to submit to a background check and a litany of questions, they must be at least interested and sincere about getting into a relationship.
And because of that many matchmaker have a very high success rate,
"We have historically got it right with the first introduction on a number of occasions although it can take time, as often what people think they want at first, is not always what will fulfil them long term, its our job to offer that guidance too.
We take time to get to know and really develop an understanding of our clients, who they are and their needs and desires." says Copland.
To the women who have given up on searching alone, and are used to outsourcing everything from fitness, jobs, and cleaning, delegating the task of finding Mr Right to a Matchmaker, could be a step in the right direction.